A Good Home for the Puppy

I am learning some cool stuff from the educational books I read for my job. I learned about the four thinking types: Beach Ball, Clipboard, Microscope and Puppy.

I used to believe only linear and concrete people like the clipboards and microscopes made desireable job candidates. I would do my best imitation and hope to get the job, then get frustrated trying to tame my puppy-ness.

I was brave enough this time to be a puppy during the interview. Would you believe, it, they actually wanted a puppy?

Puppies are also known as abstract random thinkers. We like to talk about things. We live in a world of feelings and emotion and learn best when we can personalize information. And yes, we tend to take things personally. But I will be your loyal friend. Just throw me a bone and pat my head once in awhile!

Here's what's important to me in a work setting:

• Comfortable environment
• Encouraging atmosphere
• Supportive grouping
• Safe climate
• Respectful colleagues
• Empathic listeners
• Sensitive peers

This explains why my old work environment was so ill-suited to me. It was hard spending those five months in the shelter waiting for someone to take me home. I hope my new family is as happy with me as I am with them.

No matter what your brain type is -- it's wonderful to be wanted for exactly who you are. Be couragous enough to be yourself. It's worth it!

Cancer Sucks

Fight cancer with everything you've got.

On Settling

Six months ago I wrote the following...

"A wise friend told me to add something new you need to let go of something else. I'm about to let something go. Not my husband, don't worry. Let's call it a painful pair of shoes. You won't find the right shoes if you keep wearing the wrong ones. I need to trust in the pain. Pain is a sign that something needs attention. I'm willing to go barefoot, to step out in faith that I don't need to live in pain beyond the season I've suffered through. And if memory serves me right from having done this before, it won't be long before I say 'I stayed in those shoes too long.'"

Zoom to the present...

The barefoot months were painful too. More than I ever imagined. Second guessing was my favorite pastime. It felt like the scene from Dr. Zhivago in which Omar Sharif treks through the snow for what must be weeks or months. Was it worth it? Heck Yeah! Now that I'm on the other side of that journey I'm glad I trusted my gut. The hard part is that the pain can get worse before it gets better. Pick your pain. Settling is a chronic, soul-eating pain. Jumping off a cliff is an acute, frightening and LOUD pain. The point is that one leads to something new and the other doesn't.

Instead of settling, I'm CELEBRATING!

I'm so happy I didn't settle. Be bold, be strong -- God is with you.

Hush Money

Most relationships start out with lots of great talks about how you think a relationship should be. It's fun to share all your dreams and say "me too!" to your potential soul mate. Talking about it is one thing. Living it is another. The guy who wanted to be with you every night gets back to his night out with the guys. And she is having "headaches" more often. In exchange, he buys her a little bauble. Or she makes him a pie. He manicures the lawn but leaves a pile of dishes. She puts on a few pounds and says "don't be so superficial." More baubles. Maybe even a Plasma TV with a tricked out sound system. Or that SUV they "need." "Take this, honey, and please don't bring up that subject I'm so tired of arguing about." Hush. Here's some money. I'm not saying this is happening to me. But I recognize it as a weed that could grow if it's not ripped out in the early stages. It has the potential to snuff out intimacy, harden a heart and breed dishonesty like rabbits. It's the enemy we must keep at bay. The cure? Be honest. Respect the other person's honesty even when it's not what you want to hear. Do what you say. Make your words and actions line up. Recognize you may not get everything you want -- but if you have honesty and mutual respect, that is enough. There isn't enough money in the world to hush me. But, thankfully, there is enough love.

Too good to be true?

I think I have landed a dream job. I'm nervous even typing that. I feel like I have gone from a trailer park in a cold, dreary town to Beverly Hills. It's an amazing culture shock. I am lecturing myself to not talk about my ghetto past to my new cube mates. But the contrast is giving me a deer-in-the-headlights expression that defies Botox. The moral lesson here was eloquently explained by my second Mom Frederee -- "If something drags you down, turn it a-loose." And there is so much pressure to tolerate abuse. Don't. Please, don't. Move on. God is with you in seeking respect. You don't earn respect by tolerating disrespect. And don't listen to people who tell you to "just accept it." You are good. You are worthy of respect. Don't put up with crap. I put up with it for too long, thinking "it's just me," "it's like this everywhere," "the world has changed," and "I must be more tolerant." NO! I must be more persistent. Detach with love. Move on. Hang with people you admire and want to be like. Make the effort to improve and strive for excellence. The gutter is no place to hang out. Rise above. You deserve it. And you're worth it!