Most relationships start out with lots of great talks about how you think a relationship should be. It's fun to share all your dreams and say "me too!" to your potential soul mate. Talking about it is one thing. Living it is another. The guy who wanted to be with you every night gets back to his night out with the guys. And she is having "headaches" more often. In exchange, he buys her a little bauble. Or she makes him a pie. He manicures the lawn but leaves a pile of dishes. She puts on a few pounds and says "don't be so superficial." More baubles. Maybe even a Plasma TV with a tricked out sound system. Or that SUV they "need." "Take this, honey, and please don't bring up that subject I'm so tired of arguing about." Hush. Here's some money. I'm not saying this is happening to me. But I recognize it as a weed that could grow if it's not ripped out in the early stages. It has the potential to snuff out intimacy, harden a heart and breed dishonesty like rabbits. It's the enemy we must keep at bay. The cure? Be honest. Respect the other person's honesty even when it's not what you want to hear. Do what you say. Make your words and actions line up. Recognize you may not get everything you want -- but if you have honesty and mutual respect, that is enough. There isn't enough money in the world to hush me. But, thankfully, there is enough love.
"Make your words and actions line up." Yes, yes! I spent several months telling a good friend that his actions didn't match his words. Then I learned that I could only make sure that my actions matched my words.
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